20 February 2011

How Green is Too Green

So I was trimming my finger and toe nails the other day and I was thinking to myself: wow, do these things grow fast. I mean, if I don't trim them every week I actually risk impaling myself by the middle of the second week because they are so long. And as I was dumping them into the rubbish, I was thinking to myself: With 6.9 billion people worldwide, it seems that we would pretty much have a nearly endless supply if we could just figure out something to make out of them.

Have no fear, the Internet is here! Planet Green to the rescue. They say that I can make compost, pot scrubber, or art with my nails. Well, those ideas are green alright: puke green like tile and shag rugs from the seventies. OK, composting is making dirt which is sort of OK, but I was hoping for something like making bricks, pressboard, insulation, or something like that. I mean, I can still just step outside and scoop up dirt from the ground. I don't really find myself being short of dirt. And even if I did want to 'clean' my pots with my old nails, I am pretty sure that would guarantee I would be eating home alone. And there is only one word I can think of to describe art made of human nails: Ewwww!

I know what your thinking: It took me all the way to the third idea before I went Ewwww. OK, but in my defense, a Google search of “fingernails recycling” will show that I am not the first person to think this up.

So there.

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